Life seems to be flying by and I would do anything to slow it down, savor the little things in my days that bring me smiles and stop my children from growing!
My oldest Katherine turned nine this past Tuesday and I felt like crying, not because she is getting bigger or I want to hold onto her forever (those things are true too), but mostly because I feel like life is simply so busy and full that I worry I am not able to savor enough of the moments with my children.
My husband and I promised Katherine that she could have a room to herself sometime in the coming year. She has shared a room with Elizabeth (6) and Mary (4) for the last couple of years. It has been such a great thing for all three and taught them to share, be patient with each other and to be dependent on one another. None enjoy going to bed with out the others present.
So this moving of Katherine has been something that Eric and I have thought about, prayed about and talked to Katherine a lot about prior to this week. It is a BIG deal in our home! She and I began cleaning out the front bedroom together on Friday, it was so fun to share this time with her and to organize things together. She is a planner, an organizer and a talkative little person. She reminds me the most of myself out of all the girls, yet I am not sure I was as outgoing and talkative. The front room has been our craft room/guest room up until now and as we began to put away and organize and find new homes for things, she started talking about her plans for the room. What fun to hear these things, her mind has been working and she is really excited!
Elizabeth wandered into the room after her quiet time and came over to snuggle. She asked what we were doing and I reminded her that this was going to be Katherine's room as soon as we had organized things. I could immediately see in her face that she was not going to handle this move well. I said, "Someday you too will have your own room" and promised that Caroline could move into Katherine's spot soon (Lizzy and Katherine share a double bed). She brightened at that idea, but then her lip began to quiver. I asked her if she was going to miss Katherine...no words were uttered just tears. I hugged her and promised lots of special times for she and her older sis in Katherine's room. Oh, how I hate to see one of my children cry, especially Lizzy. She so looks up to Katherine, wants to do what she does, thinks of her first in sharing something exciting, and looks for her approval. When I had a chance to talk to Katherine alone I shared with her how Elizabeth had reacted. She had lots of good ideas of how to spend special times with her sister, knitting, beading, talking, snuggling.
I think the more children I have had the better I am at enjoying them and relaxing. My personality tends to be organized, routine oriented, and one that likes to accomplish. I worry more now then ever that the very thing that helps me to care for my household and keep things running effeciently may be the thing that hinders me the most. As I see my children growing (literally) before my eyes I am more aware of the need to enjoy the day to dayness of our household and I try to be more purposeful to get down on their level, really listen to them, and hold them close every chance I get.
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